Games: I'm Not Talking About CLUE

Games.  Everyone plays them.  It doesn’t matter if you’re single, in a relationship, or married, the games go on.

There are a couple reasons why I wanted to blog about this topic.  I’ll start with the most apparent one.  The Hunger Games is coming out this weekend!  Yay!  The movie has nothing to do with what I’ll be writing about but I’m really excited for it!  Guys, if your feeling in the dark right now, I suggest you start googling!  Girls everywhere love these books more than Twilight and if you experienced the chaos and obsession of Twilight, this is 10 times worse (or better). 

Now, back to the topic of discussion.  Playing games adds anticipation when dating and it can be used as a tool for flirting.  Just like dating, games have evolved over the years.  Granted, I don’t have a degree on this subject, but it’s successfully worked for me a few times.  Except for the rare instances where the guy was a dud.  On a side note, games are useless if the person you’re dating has a boring personality.  If that’s the case, you should be running for the hills, stat.

If you’re single, play hard to get.  Some say that singletons shouldn’t play this game, but seriously, if we didn’t, everyone would be bored within a week and peace out.  However, there is a point where playing hard to get can get down right aggravating.  If it’s taken to the extreme, you run the risk of being so vague and unavailable that it comes off like you’re not even interested which means you loose and no one likes to be loser.  So be smart.  Find the middle ground.  Follow the general rules like don’t text back right away, don’t be too available, wait 3 days to call after the first date, and always be slightly mysterious.   

If you’re in a relationship, keep it spicy!  New relationships are fun an exciting, but the thrill can sometimes lead to constant texting, calling, and hanging out.  In some cases, that can lead to a relationship system overload.  Yikes!  Of course it’s amazing to spend time with the person who lights your fire, but remember the beginning is the best part!  Play a few lighthearted games and keep it newer longer. 

Married?  Keep playing!  You have the rest of your lives together so what better way to zest it up then to play a little hard to get and re-live the beginning.  Obviously, you’ll have to modify these games at every stage, but I think it adds a healthy dose of pleasure to any relationship.

My final word of advice; be your-self, have fun, and take a date to go see The Hunger Games this weekend!  As always, happy dating everyone!

One Date, Two Dates, Three Dates, Door

A friend of mine recently asked me if I had kicked a guy I was dating to the curb yet.  Laughingly I told her no, but in truth, I was already coming up with a plan to let the guy down easy.  I pondered why I didn’t just tell her immediately that I fully intended to “kick him to the curb”.  Part of me wondered if I wasn’t giving the guy a fair shot.  Then I realized that I shouldn’t be ashamed of this reputation.  Honestly, its probably saved me from inevitable heartache on more than one occasion.  So, instead of pretending that I don’t have a 3 date reputation, I’m going to own it and brand it.

Ladies and gentlemen, introducing Jose Cuervos Guide to Dating.  One date, two dates, three dates, door.  I'm sure you've all heard of the original rhyme.  One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.  Fun to say, not fun to do.  The goal here is to explain the first three dates and why my theory works.  Disclaimer: this guide is for those who have good instincts regarding people and their character. 

Here’s the breakdown.  Date One:  You’ll both be on your best behavior (or at least try to be).   On this date you’ll know if you’re interested right away.  You’ll talk about basic information that you probably already knew because you stalked his/her facebook page.  At the end of date one, you’ll know if there's going to be date two.  Personally, I’m not a fan of kissing on the first date (unless my date is Ryan Gosling) so on date two, if there's a mutual desire, go for it.  Just remember no one likes to play tonsil hockey.  Date Two:  Both parties dress to impress and conversation consists of recapping information you’ve gathered on date one (or facebook) and expanding on it.  There should be casual flirting and appropriate touching to determine chemistry.  If conversation is easy and attraction exists, you’re on your way to date three.  If conversation is awkward, one sided, and you’d rather kiss a Jabba the Hut than your date, then inform your date that you plan to move to the moon next week and will be out of touch indefinitely.  Date Three:  This is the test to see if everyone has been listening to each other and asking better questions than "how was your day".  If you haven’t seen any red flags yet, you may have a winner.  If you saw more than one red flag by date two, then you shouldn’t be on date three.

Dating is awesome, but if you know someone isn’t for you, don’t stretch it out.  What’s the point?  You don’t need more than three dates to see if you're interested.  Of course you never want to sell someone short or "kick them to the curb" too soon, but don’t prolong mediocre dates in hopes the person across from you magically changes into someone you can connect with.  If it doesn't work out, always be polite about it.  Chances are that if you aren't feeling it, they probably aren't either.  Besides, and I'm sure Jose Cuervo would agree, there are plenty of other fish in the sea.